Friends

I don't like to open up to people. I'm friendly, I talk to everyone, I share stories with people. But it's rare I find a good friend, one that I can really talk to.

I have a few closer friends here in town. We met during the Obama campaign. They are true friends, ones I could go to for anything, and they would help. But they don't really know the real me. They see the part that I want them to see.

I have a few closer friends from my parenting meetings. But, because I'm the leader, they have to only see what I want them to see, too. So, while they know me, they don't know the true me.

I have a friend from high school. We talk all the time. Recently, she called off her wedding and has had other issues with her family. I can tell her anything, and she can tell me anything. We've always been close, and it's hard to see both of us so far away. But, things are changing. I found myself judging her not too long ago. And I know she's not wanting to talk to me as much. And, just when she needed me most, I wasn't able to be there for her...I just had too much on my plate, and couldn't "deal" with her. It's just different when we talk now. I think we're growing apart.

I have another friend from my younger years. But it's hard to talk to him. He's judgmental and mean-spirited. He doesn't support me like a friend should, and talks down to me all the time. I'm really not sure why I continue to talk to him at all. He is, quite frankly, an ass.

I do have one friend that I can share anything with. Sometimes it's hard to talk, but I cherish our friendship.

Sometimes it's hard to hold onto friendships. I don't want things to change...I hope I can hold onto the true friends I have. And I hope that I can be as good a friend to those that have been so great to me.